Tribute to My Dad

Well, Father's Day is fast approaching and I must say, the thoughts of it makes me wanna high-tail it somewhere I've never before been. Somewhere where thoughts of Dad aren't surrounding me.

I definitely don't want to spend the day in Fortune Harbour, where he's EVERYWHERE. He's there everytime I see the woodstove, and I remember how he worked so hard to keep us warm. The chovies he made are still hanging on a nail. He's there when I see the wharf, where he brought me to fish when I was young. He's everywere there. Picking raspberries for jam as soon as we've landed. He's cutting the grass with a kitchen knife so we wouldn't have to walk through the grass and be "scared". He's at the well, bailing it out, even in the outhouse that he built and was so pleased with. I remember being so terrified of the outhouse as a child. He would always let me use the "pee pot" and dump it later.

Oh my, just typing these things reminds me of the amazing man he was. Unfortunately, it also reminds me of how I could never measure up. That I, having my own children, am failed miserably at walking in his footsteps. I'm so busy with life, I never take the time out with my own children that Dad took out for us. And I'm sure if he was here right now, he'd probably tell me I'm expecting too much from myself, that he really didn't do that much, and that I should not be so hard on myself. I'm only human after all.

That's the thing about Dad. He was kind, compassionate, caring, sensitive, hard working, but always had time to make us happy. Even when he was working as fast as he could so he could get home and put lunch on for us, he would never complain if my feet were cold and he rubbed them in his hair to warm them up!

Sounds amazing. I know. But you know, he never felt that he was doing something special. He didn't feel he needed to be commended or rewarded. He did all these things because something inside him told him he wanted to! No matter what we did, or how we behaved, he just gave and gave and never wanted anything in return. I've never heard him say, be good for Dad now.

I'm sitting here trying to recal a time that I did something amazing like that for my children. I mean I love them and provide for them and I'm the best mother that I can be. I take time to "cuddle" with them, and they know I love them. But have I ever really given so much of myself, and not expected them to be perfect? Seems to me, I need to mellow out. What message am I sending to my children when I do something and say to them, ok, I'll do this, but you have to be good when we go to.....well..wherever!

Anyway, getting off topic. This Father's Day, I'd like to celebrate. Not as I always did, for that's impossible. And I know he wouldn't want me "snotting and balling!". It will be a chore for sure!

This world has become less bright now that he's gone. Almost a year has passed. I can hardly believe that. Maybe because I've been away for the past 9 months. It just seems that everything is difficult now. Sure, there's people to call on to help you. But it's not the same.."Dad? Where's the nail clippers?" "Dad, can you glue my shoes?" "Dad, can you give me a ride home?"

Now, don't misunderstand. I miss him for more than what he did for me. I miss the talks we had. And as hard as it was to lay in bed with him and watch him pine away, some of the best talks I had with Dad were in his bed. We talked about heaven, and life, and marriage, and children, (he told me the most important thing to teach them is that Jesus is the answer for everything)...boy he's so right! I miss the times I played guitar and sang for him. My biggest fan. When I played for him, I thought I was the greatest singer/guitarist in the world. He LOVED the music. If it weren't for him asking so much, I'd never have learned the guitar. And I'd probably never have practiced if I didn't have him to play songs for! :)

He loved music so much, and he taught us all to love it too! God love him, he could remember the lyrics to a song like nobody else. Even though when he sang them, like everything else he did, he had to do it in a hurry. :) Nothing but dying could slow him down. Make a batch of bread? 3 minutes or less! How about mowing the grass?? No sweat. How about being in too much of a hurry to move the ladder when painting the eves! No time, he'd just jump the ladder over. Got time to shovel off the roof of the social centre, but no time to climb down. Just jump off into the snowpile!! And eat? Shark!!...he'd be finished and up washing the dishes before all of us were sat down to eat!

One thing that I will always miss is seeing him in Church, sitting in his favorite seat, watching and listening to me sing, with the eyes closed listening, and nodding his approval. He made me love what I did. I'm sure I'll go back to singing in church again once I settle back here in Corner Brook. And though I love the service I provide, and I am proud that the talent God gave me is being used for Him, I can't help but feel it will never be the same. I know he's in heaven, still proud of me, even though I haven't been consistent with going to Mass. But he totally understands, and loves me no matter what. Is that true of anyone else in the world? I really don't think so.

This post could go on for days. There were so many millions of things about Dad that were cute and quirky. But the fact of the matter is. He was the best Dad a girl could have. He taught me and lead me down this path of life with a gentle word and a tight hug.

I wish I was just like him.

Just like the tatoo of the dandelions and forget me nots, he'll forever be imprinted into the minds of those who love him. Those whose lives he touched in many ways.

One song that he asked me to learn, because he loved it so much is Josh Grobin's "You Raise Me Up".

Dad, that song may have touched you, as you related it to God, and I know that you felt like it was talking to your heart. God raised you up! And through Him you could do anything. But that song was special to me for another reason. I always sang that song "to" you, not for you. You are the one who lifted my spirits when I was down. I always was amazed at your ability to make things seem better and brighter. You helped me see the good in things. You raised me up with love and compassion. And I'll always admire, respect and love you. Nothing will ever change that. I'll see you soon Dad!
xo

Facebook and Ringo and Hi 5 OH MY!

With all these "Networking" programs on the go, it seems like it should be easier than ever to hook up with old friends and stay in touch. But for some reason, I can't manage to stay in touch with my best friend my whole life who lives in Alberta. I mean there's no reason why I can't call her everyday and see how she is. I can manage to stay in contact with virtual strangers who I have met through my internet browsings. What's up with that? Why are we so quick to respond to strangers, yet our loved ones go unnoticed for far too long? I'm gonna try and be better!!

Anyway, just got tuned in to facebook...it's retarded, and addictive! I've been scrolling through people and pictures for AGES! It's fun to see all these people I know who I didnt know that they know people I know. :)

SHORT AND SWEET...I'm too engrosed in facebook to write a longer post!

Until Next Time...

Blogger's Nightmare

Well, seems like I'm in Blogger's Hell. My Davinci Code Blog I noticed popped down to the bottom, and it's not showing up in my list of blogs to edit. ARRRGH!

Can't someone help me? Isn't there a blog superhero out there to come to my rescue??

All because I changed the date on the blog entry because it came up as Nov, though I posted in March!!

Mummering Anyone?

Well, isn't this the cutest Heritage Fair display you've ever seen?
Aimée presented this at her school's Heritage Fair today. I'm so proud of her (and us for all the work WE did).

She decided the topic and decided what research she was going to do, and boy, we worked our guts out to put this together. She chose ten questions which she would cover in her report. She found all the info on the internet and we started putting it together. She sat next to me and told me what to type. I can still type 70 wpm, so it was much faster if I typed. Over a matter of a week or two, the report was finished, but she reviewed it and proofread it at least 10 times. The report also had a pile of photos (including pictures of her and Matthew mummering). She has a definite affinity for writing, research and the arts. She LOVED every minute of it and she does research essays for fun from time to time. (Even I wasn't that bad!!)

Then, the display. First we had to cover the backboard with material, because white was boring. After burned fingers with hot glue, put the border on, cut out all the MUMMERING letters (which took ages), and glued the heading on back. Then we decided what info was going to go on there and found photographs to put on there. It took us days to decide where to place all the items on the display. Our dining room table was tied up for a week!!

Then she wondered what to put on the display table as artifacts. We ordered the "Land and Sea" show called Fortune Bay Christmas which first aired in 1986, and Uncle Kev put that onto a DVD for us to play on the mini dvd player.

Nanny baked a boiled raisin cake to give out with the purity syrup and peppermint knobs and coconut kisses. Nanny also did a painting of mummers for the display.

The report was also displayed. We even had the report cover laminated and had the report bound. Cost us a fortune, but it was worth it. She got selected to represent her school at the district fair at SWGC on May 5. She had her photo taken for the Western Star, and was later interviewed (taped interview for the Star). Her answers were soooo cute. The interviewer asked her what the whole purpose of the Heritage Fair was. She said "So we can learn about eachother's heritage." She went on to say that two of her best friends did their projects on Matty Mitchell and found out that they are related. :) I can't wait to see this in print.

I can hear Calvin Pretty now. He tormented Aimée one time before and said that he had to stop buying the paper because every time he looked in it he saw her. Then she was on TV and he said he had to get rid of cable too. :) She attracts media attention whenever she participates in things. I remember one summer, I bet she was in the paper 3 times. She was a spectator at the Triathlon, then as a participant of the Kids of Steel, and then for the Canada Day celebration. She's so proud.

Anywho, there will be some representation from the fair at the university to go on to the national fair in Lethbridge, Alberta. Because the theme this year was supposed to be "Where Once They Stood", I'm not sure she'll really qualify, but then to quote her report...."This year’s theme is "Where Once They Stood." To me, this means that we should "go back in time," and learn about our ancestors and what they did during their lives that affect our lives today. While Mummering is not the most important thing on everyone’s minds, it’s very important to me. It helps me feel connected to our past and our ancestors."

Wouldn't it be something if she were chosen and got to go Mummering in Alberta??
I'll let you all know how she did!

Until Next Time . . .

What's with those kids??

My perfect children.

Okay. I know my kids aren't perfect. Whose children are? But though I complain about their behavior (you can see above, my kids are Crazy!!), I do realize that they are on par with other children and are pretty sensible (despite what you see above.) Actually, they are typical children, fun-loving and totally lacking any self restraint.

My parents had 8 kids. We fought like cats and dogs, (over the contents of the "Sock Drawer") and we treated eachother like mortal enemies. But I'm sure we never ever tied eachother up!

This episode happened last month, about 2 feet from me. Obviously, I wasnt paying attention, I was busy working on a project with my Mom. What a laugh we had at those kids.

Children have this amazing ability to drive you totally crazy, almost to the point where you want to run away yourself, but you can't help but love them! It always amazes me that no matter how much they try your patience, how many times they tell you that they hate you and you ruined their lives, you cant help but look at them while they are busy playing or quietly watching tv, or while they are sleeping and wonder where the time went, and how did they grow to be so beautiful and awesome kids. What, did you forget that 5 minutes ago they wanted to be adopted?

I think it's more that we remember how infuriating our parents were and we cut our kids more slack than we had.

Whatever it is, there's nothing like the love for a child. I wonder how God must feel. I mean if my imperfect love feels that good, imagine how great that perfect love must feel. And how bad it must be when we disappointed him.

Those are my thoughts for tonight. I need to go back to bed :)
Until Next Time . . .

Aca Bella

It's hard to believe, it's been 6 months since I've blogged, but I've been so busy it's unreal! I feel sometimes I'm in need of finding a way to clone myself so I can be everything to everyone. Busy or not, I live for the things I've signed up to do. Though I admit I am just starting to recover from burn out. Yet I keep on taking on things, and as you all know, I don't do anything "Half-Assed." (Except apparently this Web Log) And to use an "aca bella-ism", I Enj'ys it!! Seems I'm never going to find time to finish some of those songs I've been working on, or do some arranging for Aca Bella that I have been hoping to start on.

Anyway, as promised, the Aca Bella post!! YEAY! I'm never sure about how to spell our name. Whether it is Accabella, Aca Bella, Acabella, I guess is irrelevant. All that's important is how we sound right? I'm pretty sure for business purposes it's Aca Bella. (The "fella Bellas" will correct me if I'm wrong) Jim, Carolyn's husband, said we should have been called "The Foxy Pitches". That's so much easier to spell.

Ok, this group as it appears above (L-R; Andrea Green, Darlene Steeves, Mary Keefe, Carol Ann Oldford, Pamela Gill, Elizabeth Randell, Elizabeth Snow, and last but not least, Carolyn Parsons) had its first rehearsal on February12, 2006, and first public performance the very next day at the Arts and Culture Centre's Kinette Variety Show. Crazy huh? Though Carolyn and I had never heard these pieces (Frobisher Bay and Siyahamba), I think we rocked (once we realized it was easier to not read the words to Siyahamba and just go with the gut).

The group had formed the fall prior to this (Fall 2005) and performed at the OBP Christmas Reading "The Polar Express" but they didn't really shine till Carolyn and I came aboard! :) In all honesty, I remember thinking that these girls rocked and that I was so jealous of them and wanted to be a part of the group. Of course I said nothing. Until one night at Casual Jacks at the OBP's cast party Rocky Horror Picture Show someone mentioned that I should join. What I didn't know at the time is that in order to become a member, a unanimous decision has to be made by all other members. It was over three months later when Darlene emailed me and asked me if I wanted to join.....so that's the more long than short of it. We've been on a whirlwind ever since. We've sang at a convention, A&CC for benefits and for Summer Sessions, at City Hall, and even sang with OBP for the opening of the Duathlon in the main arena at the Pepsi Centre for the athletes from around the world. What a feeling it's been.

Our next performance will be November 30/06 at the A&CC. That promises to be fun. It's going to be cool to sing some Christmas songs and our old staples. We are planning a Christmas Show for mid December, so watch your emails.

Enough babbling. I want to introduce the group.

Andrea Green
Nutcase!
Been singing in choirs from kindergarten until Grade 12 (and actually went back to High School Choir after graduation because I was still in the age group for festival!!) and was in the Alumni Choir for a few years. I've also sung each weekend in church since I was old enough (like 12), but never sang solo until my High School Graduation. It's only now am I starting to feel some fledgling confidence that I can sing! I mean, thing is, I know I have the musical talent (the ear), I just never was sure my voice was good enough. I always feel inferior to the group too, as I don't read music. But what I lack in musical theory, I make up for with hard work.

What I think makes Aca Bella rock are the friendships formed by our mutual love for music. These ladies are amazing, and I'll elaborate below. I'm proud to know each and every one of these ladies.

Darlene Steeves
sings Second Soprano and Alto, is a music teacher at Humber Elementary, and has been deemed our director. (She teaches my Aimée actually). You wont see her standing in front of us waving her arms though. We need her sound more! She directs with her head and breathing weirdly enough and uses a pitchfork to find all our starting notes! It works super well. We all lean on her for the breakdown of pieces and she decides who'll sing what parts, etc. (Our practices without her are always more interesting!! The OBPlayers who were involved with Gatchers will recall those music rehearsals that sounded like injured animals....that was when Darlene was away. Scary actually.

Darlene has a bachelor's degree in music and a masters in music education as far as I understand (please correct me if I'm wrong Darlene). But forgetting all that background, her love for music is what makes her be a part of this thing. She's been part of community choirs and Festival 500 has been a source of inspiration for her. It seems being with Acabella is what she's most proud of. And man, the girl can dance! She's now attempting pointe!! Where she finds time, I have no idea!

Mary Keefe
sings Alto or Bass. That girl has a set of wicked deep pipes. It spooks me how low she can go! It appears that Mary started out in the U of T in music (B.A.). She went through year one sight singing by hiding in the back of the room and singing quietly to the prof while giggling nervously. During second year, she was in a class with a bunch of opera majors. On the first day, the professor made her get up and sing some ridiculously difficult piece in front of the class. She says that all the opera majors laughed. I doubt it was as bad as she says. She then left, went to the registrar's office, and switched programs to psychology! She didn't sing for years after that.

We are so glad she came back to singing. Anyone who has music in their heart will always come back.

Carol Ann Oldford
There's a girl who can sing the guts out of anything. Carol Ann's style is pretty well everything. She does this one Irish traditional piece called Bonnie Wood Green that would melt your heart. It's as if the piece was written for her. Though she normally sings Soprano, she also from time to time sings alto in the nummmannummmm pieces (the low doo wop parts of songs) as if those were written for her. She can do anything and everything, and man I for one am sooo jealous. Her voice never seems tired and she's involved in so much besides a busy career, night classes and an active schedule. You should see her bellydance! I never knew a human's body could get into some of those positions. She's a great gal!

Pamela Gill
sings soprano or second most times. This girl is a one-of-a-kind, original piece of work. She is so full of life it's scary to me. I've never met another soul who was involved in so much, yet is pretty well a single mom for a third of the year when her husband is away working. Pam is very talented and everyone who knows her can't help but be captivated by her personality. She has sung in many choirs (Church, Community and University) and has taken voice and piano lessons. But aside from musical talent, she can tie the stem of a cherry in a knot with her tongue. Interesting girl!


Elizabeth Randall
sings alto. Liz has an amazing talent. She can act and sing like ya wouldn't believe. She also learned the boadhran to play on "Paddy McGinty's Goat" and I think that's her approach to life. Try anything once! I love Liz because she loves the stage and the stage loves her. She is humble though, and would never admit to the talent she has. I remember one of the first big roles I saw her in in Guys and Dolls. It amazed me what that girl could do on stage. We are so fortunate to have her in our group.

Elizabeth Snow
sings soprano. Liz, one of the sillier members of our group, can always lighten the mood and make us laugh. She has 4 children and a dog. Anyone with that many children has to be good hearted and have an amazing sense of humor. Sometimes when we get too serious, she reminds us that we're together for the enjoyment of music and everything else is a by-product. She is a self described choir geek, has an amazing voice, but loves the social time together the most. She also has been bit by the theatre bug and has just tried her hand at directing. I am so sorry I missed the show, but I hear it was amazing.

Carolyn Parsons
sings second and alto but she can sing anything! I have never met anyone like Car. She totally freaks me out in regards to her talent. She can pretty well sight-read anything (I am so jealous!!) She can usually get the hardest pieces in no time and never needs to rely on a partner to sing her part. Carolyn has the coolest personality. She is neither flamboyant nor is she reserved. I feel like we share a lot of ideals as well. Because she was the one I knew less about when I joined Aca Bella I was so proud to have worked with her in Gatchers this year, because I got to see her talents more clearly and I got to know her (and her husband Jim) better. They both are such amazing, talented, fun, and intellectually interesting people. And boy can Jim cook!!!

These group of gals are so generous as well. They have done many benefit shows together, and graciously agreed to sing at my Dad's 90th Birthday party in September, giving up a Saturday night of their life to sing a couple of songs for my Dad. For that I'm forever thankful.

Well, having said all that, I think you get the idea how important this group is to me. I'm so happy I finally put this together. It's been sitting on my desktop for 5 months. Now I can rest that this is done.

You gals are an awesome group of people. I love each and every one of you. Each of these girls are so important to me for various reasons, which I wont go in to right now. I think if I get into that, all that water that's trying to escape from my body may start to leak out of my eyes. We can't have that can we Darlene?

Until Next Time

Corner Brook's Theatrical Future

Well, since this past weekend marked the TNL's Festival of Youth in Corner Brook, I thought this would be a good time to brag.

I have to say that I was super impressed with the calibre of talent displayed by the children in the area. They are so brave and they take the stage as if they have owned it and lived on it since conception. It's really amazing to see actually. I know how terrified I was when I was a child just to audition for school plays, but these children are fearless and amazing. It's clearly evident that the future of theatre here in Corner Brook is looking bright and is in good hands.

Kudos of course to my darling child Aimée who performed in her biggest role yet. She performed in "Hats off to Seuss", and played the character "Usher Aimée" the girl who wanted to keep the stage clean, sans the Cat in the Hat, and go shopping. Of course, eventually she was won over and enjoyed the Cat's presence. She played the character so well and was so proud to see her name near the top of the list of cast. She was so cute on stage, and I just laughed and cried watching her give it her all. I'm so proud of her. How can I help it?

Kudos to TNL for yet another sucessful youth theatre festival production. Can't wait to see next year's show.

The Human Race?

Having had one of those days when I'm disappointed with Humanity in general, I just need to rave a little while!!

What do we mean when we talk about the human race? What I really mean is why do we call it the human race. Dictonary.com defines the word race as a local geographic or global human population distinguished as a more or less distinct group by genetically transmitted physical characteristics. Of course, that's the original meaning. But I can't help but look at it in terms of the human struggle, the human test, the human "race".

We as humans are quite competitive in nature. We are hard-wired to be. It's always been survival of the fittest. We had to be the best or we didn't survive or attract the right mates. It's funny that even though we can now buy our food at supermarkets and find our mates online we still have to put our best foot forward and compete. Some of us have won battles for jobs, and mates too I might add. But have we forgotten that we need to fight for our earth? What about our dignity and self-respect?

Most people, myself included, have made mistakes. God knows there's a lot of times I've wished I'd acted differently or said something differently. Most times, pride prevents me from telling the person that I've wronged that I was stupid for saying or doing certain things. It seems we treat strangers or acquaintance better than we treat our families. I guess it's because we know that no matter what we do, our family will always be there for us. The concern that strangers may not like us drives us to chew our words and stroke these egos more carefully (when a lot of times these people need a smack up side the head!!) Case in point. How often do we make the first step and apologize to people even when we know we're right, just to end an argument. It's certainly a practice in humility, and it happens, but not nearly enough. Yeah, people might argue that you're spineless and you let people get over your time, but still, swallow your pride and just do what it takes to get along!

What I've found about the Human Population is that we are generally selfish and uncaring. Do people really care if you're under the weather? Do they care that you just lost a loved one? Likely they'll say the right things like get well soon or sorry for your loss but do they really feel your pain? No. Of course not. We never put ourselves in other peoples shoes. Someone once told me that before you make judgment, walk a mile in someone's shoes. Then you're already a mile away when you disagree with their point of view (and you have a new pair of shoes).

I think that's how we as humans really are. We think the way we want to think and we barely consider why or how other people have the opinions they have. We automatically assume they are wrong and judge them accordingly. But then is there any wonder? We have done some pretty despicable things in the history of the world. How many races were almost destroyed by hate, at least one was made extinct that I know of. (The Beothuks). No wonder we are filled with prejudices and fears. How do we get beyond these fears??

Do people really care that we're polluting our planet beyond repair or overusing our resources? Ok. There are a handful of people. But that's not enough. I truly do care. But do I care enough to take steps to stop the destruction? Well, lets see, I use more than my share of electricity and water, I always have 3-4 bags of garbage to put out a week (even though I recycle pop containers), and I waste food more than you can imagine (even though my parents always told me not to waste because there are starving children in the world.)

When will the race to become better people begin? When will I become better?When will social responsibility become as important as landing that new job? Eventually, it will be the most important thing in our lives because we'll have no choice. Can you see our future? A future that has our planet so beaten down, it will take nothing short of hard word and major lifestyle changes as well as a miracle to bring us back from the brink of total self destruction. I know this seems a little harsh, but this is the harsh reality.

When will being courteous, friendly and considerate become a priority in our lives. Looking around the news stations, we are filled with violent graphics of people who are so filled with hate and destruction, I can hardly fathom how they can breathe. Yet, each year there are more crimes, fuller prisons and people who are forever changed by violence. If someone wrongs us, what is our first reaction? For some it is revenge. Others could say "I'm not talking to them again!" or "I'd like to smack that person." Why can't we sit there and think! Use the brains God gave us. Think WHY did this person say this or do that. I think most of the time we'll find we ourselves have some sort of responsibility. If we find we don't, look at the person themselves. Have they had the kind of life where they've been raised and cultured to be confrontational and abusive? We need to understand our opponents and not be so quick to judge. One wise man once said

"But I say to you, Have love for those who are against you, and make prayer for those who are cruel to you;"

Matt 5:44. Jesus of course was right! If we all (and I mean ALL OF HUMANANITY) followed this, imagine the world we'd live in. The man brutally died on the cross for us and see how we repay him? By raping the world and hating eachother. Man I feel terrible for that.

Maybe this week, if we all tried not to judge people as quickly, if we were more thoughtful of the earth, it would make some small difference. If not a difference to the world, at least to ourselves. Maybe we can make this race about ourselves. Maybe we could all compete personally with our inner-self to be better people, make a better human race, a better population, and ultimately a better world. One person at a time!